Does You Really Think They Look Okay?

"Hmm, I don't know..."

"C'mon, Dr. ________, my husband noticed the other day. I think he's right"

"Well, uh, there's definitely a slight shift to the right and, hmm, let me see again... yes, maybe..."

"Oww!"

"Sorry" (sheepishly)

"How about the other breast?"

"That one is okay, symmetric. No problems"

"Do you feel any lymph nodes?"

"No"

"Why does the implant shift like that?"

"Well, sometimes the healing process takes months, you know... scar tissue, etc."

"I have another question..." (as she puts her bra on)

"Okay, go ahead, shoot"

"What about vaginal dryness?"

"Are you experiencing pain during intercourse?"

"Yes, it hurts when we... you know.."

"Have you tried K-Y or Astroglide?"

"Yes, but, it's not always ready... not always spontaneous. Why is that?"

"It's the tamoxifen"

"Really? Will it get better?"

"Maybe... but, the drugs basically put you into early menopause..."

"But, I'm only 32"

"Yes, I know. How about your libido?"

"It's low. Sometimes, I just don't feel like doing it. I don't feel attractive. I mean, something seems strange. And my husband just doesn't understand. He tries, but he gets frustrated."

(Pause. Silence.)

"Tell me more"

"I just don't feel whole. I know the odds are okay. But, I'm 32 for Christsakes. THIRTY-TWO. I'll never have children. My body feels disfigured. I hate this goddamn breast! I mean, look at them. They look so strange.

(More silence)

"Do you really think they look okay?"